I am a happy camper - I finally went out to the news store downtown and had a look around and found what I was looking for: a pagan magazine! Pan Gaia to be specific. I started reading it last night and am very pleased and can't wait to really get into it. I have already decided I want a subscription once I clear up my finances a little more.

I am also thinking about getting a post office box to have my pagan-y things sent to me. I know it's an added expense, and I know easily argued an unnecessary one. But I am only thinking about it just now. I have my pros and cons, but the more I think about it, the more unnecessary and somewhat childish my reasoning is for having one.  

Samhain is nearly here - the new year. A time for me to think and reflect on a number of things: this past year, the new year, lost loved ones, achievements, disappointments, things I want to change, do differently; accomplishing the things I have merely aspired, letting go of negative things and any regrets I may have. It's taking one last look back before moving forward. So much has changed...

Some things I am thinking about... 

 - I want to write out my negative things to tear up and let go.

 - I want to write out the things that are positive, my aspirations, goals, plans, desires and dreams - no matter how outlandish and improbable they may seem.

 - How am I going to improve myself, my lifestyle, my finances? Better my career, my time management? My relationships with friends, family, and Sigurd? 

 - How/when exactly will I celebrate Samhain 

 - I want to clean and rid myself of clutter. Start fresh for the new year. Donate Items I no longer need. Recycle. Purge. Organize...

 - My fears... I am afraid of doing everything mediocre, of no well-known success. I am curious about many things and don't really have a desire to focus on just one thing. I am afraid my passions for things are only flashes in a pan, nothing more than infatuation. I ruminate too much and do not act enough. 

 Many of these things I already have the answer to. I just need to do. I cannot wait for this weekend to get active and start afresh!!!

 Happy Samhain, everyone!